August 19. “Button, today’s one more dull and depressing day.

It’s been raining non-stop since the last two days. Here are some jokes to cheer you up. I’m also making some jhal muri. The two of us can have it with some hot adrak chai since no one else is at home.”

“That will be lovely since I was feeling really low. How do you do this?”

“Do what?”

“Remove the gloom with a swish of your magic wand and bring in sunshine! It’s simply amazing. Are you a magician by any chance?”

“I’m not but would love to be one. Enjoy” 

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America…

MARIA: Here it is.

TEACHER: Correct.  Now class, who discovered America?

CLASS: Maria.

TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?

JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.

TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell ‘crocodile?’

GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L’

TEACHER: No, that’s wrong

GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?

DONALD: H I J K L M N O.

TEACHER: What are you talking about?

DONALD: Yesterday you said it’s H to O.

TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago.

WINNIE: Me!

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?

GLEN: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.

TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ‘ I. ‘

MILLIE: I  is…

TEACHER: No, Millie….. Always say, ‘I  am.’

MILLIE: All right…  ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.’

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?

LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand…

TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

SIMON: No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook.

TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on ‘My Dog’ is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did you copy his

CLYDE: No, sir. It’s the same dog.

TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested

HAROLD: A teacher

“Too good. I enjoyed myself one hundred percent.”